The Hidden Costs of Abrasive Leadership

Jimmy Burroughes
3 min readFeb 1, 2024

In the dynamic world of leadership, few challenges are as pervasive and damaging as dealing with abrasive leaders. It’s a topic we delved into on a recent episode of The High-Performance Leader Podcast, where I had the privilege of conversing with Bonnie Artman Fox, a workplace conflict expert on a mission to equip leaders with the skills to navigate conscious communication and strengthen teams.

Understanding Abrasive Leadership vs. Bullying

Bonnie emphasized a critical distinction between abrasive leaders and bullies. While their impact on workplace morale and productivity may be similar, abrasive leaders lack the self-awareness to recognize their behaviour. Picture a top-performing executive, fiercely focused on results, who inadvertently alienates their team with aggressive tendencies, condescending remarks, and micromanagement. The abrasive leader doesn’t target individuals but attacks anyone hindering progress.

The Overlooked Costs in Workplace Dynamics

The costs of tolerating abrasive leaders within an organization are often underestimated. Research by Christine Porath and Christine Pearson highlights a 48% decrease in employee effort, with 80% of work time spent worrying about abrasive incidents. Furthermore, 63% of employees actively avoid the abrasive leader, leading to decreased collaboration and a toxic work environment. The emotional toll and negative impact on employee well-being can’t be overstated.

Navigating the Conversation: Risks and Benefits

Initiating a conversation with an abrasive leader can be daunting, as risks include denial, blame-shifting, or even retaliation. However, the benefits far outweigh the risks. By offering help through coaching, leaders can provide an opportunity for transformation. This intervention not only aids the abrasive leader but also prevents potential PR disasters, and lawsuits, and protects the organizational brand.

Positive Outcomes: Transforming the Leader and the Culture

Bonnie shared powerful success stories of leaders undergoing a transformation after addressing their abrasive behaviour. By providing honest feedback from coworkers, the leader gains self-awareness, creating a playbook for change. The ripple effect extends beyond the leader to the entire workplace culture. Employees, witnessing the positive shift, become more aware of their own behaviour, fostering a positive, collaborative environment.

Identifying Abrasive Tendencies Within

For leaders questioning their own behaviour, Bonnie suggests a critical self-reflection question: “What’s it like to be on the other side of me?” Seeking feedback from a trusted circle can reveal blind spots and pave the way for personal growth. Executives can further identify abrasive tendencies by observing reactions such as overreactions to stress, micromanagement, or an unpredictable mood.

Fostering Self-Awareness: A Catalyst for Change

Bonnie’s work underscores the profound impact of fostering self-awareness in leaders. Addressing unresolved wounds or scars from the past that drive abrasive behaviour is crucial. Her book, “How Did My Family Get in My Office?” explores how leaders’ family dynamics often manifest in the workplace, offering insights and strategies for positive change.

Bonnie Artman Fox sheds light on a critical issue affecting workplace dynamics. Leaders willing to confront abrasive behaviour not only enhance their own effectiveness but also contribute to building resilient, collaborative, and high-performing teams. Embracing self-awareness and initiating these conversations is the first step towards transforming workplace culture for the better.

Leaders, are you ready to make a positive impact? Dive into the podcast episode for a deeper exploration of these insights and strategies. 🎙️✨

#LeadershipTransformation #WorkplaceWellbeing #LeadershipInsights #HighPerformanceCulture #TheHighPerformanceLeader

If you enjoyed this blog, here are a few ways we can connect:

Originally published at https://jimmyburroughes.mykajabi.com.

--

--

Jimmy Burroughes

Showing leaders and teams how to change their conversations to change their business performance results. jimmyburroughes.com